My Plans

I'm definitely in a season of time where things in my life.

Have not been going as planned.

At least.

The key word there.......my plans.

Scott and I were working at the old house we just bought in Due West on
Saturday, when I got a text from my son-in-law about the terrorist attack
in Kenya.

And immediately.

My heart sank.

Not only for the people being impacted by the attack.  

But in all honesty.

Because I knew it might also impact me.

And my plans.

By and large.

I can be a very selfish person.

Maybe many of us are to some extent.

I make my plans.

But God ultimately determines my steps.

And that's exactly what happened.

My suit case has been unusually empty in the last days heading into this trip.

Very uncharacteristically empty.

I'm a planner.

And an "early" packer.

I did have my malaria meds out on the bed, but didn't have a stitch of clothes packed.

I won't say I knew something was going to happen to prevent my team from going.

But, it was not a huge surprise when Barron Cooley called me from NewSpring on
Tuesday afternoon.

To say our trip was being called off.

Even before the events in Nairobi on Saturday,
I had a sense.

For lack of a better word.

That something would happen.  

That would prevent me from going.

And.

As it turns out.

Something did happen.

And.

My plans changed.

I'd be smart to remember this verse in Psalm 37:5.


"Commit everything you do to the Lord.
Trust Him....."


And when my plans don't work out as I expected.

Trust Him.

Trust Him.

Not my plans.


P.S.......it looks like I'll be joining a team to go back to Kenya in February.

At least.

That's my plan.

(Smile)

It's Official: We Bought the Old House!

After weeks of uncertainty, I can now share.......it's official!

Scott & I bought this 98 year old house in Due West!

In fact, we closed on the house earlier today.

(If you missed our bumpy journey to buy it, you'll have to read some of my older posts.)

The house is located on Bonner Street in Due West.

Yes.......Due West.

We've had this conversation with many of our friends......and family.    It's just 20 minutes
from Greenwood and about as far to Anderson.    It's quiet.    Erskine College is our
neighbor,  along with other beautiful old houses down our street and old buildings on
the campus.

I love that there's a hardware store, a coffee shop and a Subway within walking distance
of the front door, but more than anything --- I love it because of it's age.

The house was built in 1915,  just shy of it's 100th birthday -- and it borders the Erskine
campus on the quiet street corner of Bonner & Alexander -  just a block
or so off of Main Street.

I started searching for the history of the house and soon discovered that it's referred to as the
"R. M. Stevenson House."

Robert "Milton" Stevenson was born November 20, 1860.   He was a Presbyterian
Minister, graduating from Erskine College in 1877.  Milton married Miss Emma Christian
on October 26, 1881.    According to an article I found on the pair, it said that "six children
have blessed their home."

The cool part for me was finding a picture of Milton (yeah, I feel we should be on a first
name basis.)   I wanted to see what he looked like -- and found this photograph when
I googled his name.

He was a writer and a preacher.  

And authored a book.

I was also able to find an original copy of his book on a rare book site ---and
I'm planning to make a spot for it on the mantel of the study after we move in next year.

Milton and Emma and several of their children are actually buried at the ARP Church in
Due West.   Yeah.   Don't let it freak you out like it did my youngest, but I did go see
their headstones.    I'll be living in their house.   I thought it was the only neighborly thing to
do.   (Smile.)

There's many things I love about this old place.

Every time I walk up and down the stairway in the Stevenson house, I imagine how many hands
since 1915 have held onto the hand carved banister.  

\

Scott and I are planning a total renovation of the house, made possible by getting such a good
deal on the property.    

Let me rephrase that.  

We have a well recommended local contractor who will be renovating the house
for us from top to bottom.

Scott's overseeing just the first round of renovation--- demolition!

We're taking down all the plaster walls and ceilings.  

Yep.    A demolition day will be coming in October.

We'd love to recruit as many friends as possible to bring a hammer, a crow bar and a face
mask as we take the house down to the studs!  (If you have some stress or anger to work
off, let me know!  We'll put you to work.)

We're going back in with insulation, new wiring, new plumbing and sheet  rock.  
The bones of the house are solid according to our home inspector, but the interior of the house
will be pretty much gutted and brought back to life.

The maple hardwood floors will be stripped and refinished.

A new kitchen will go in.

Bathrooms will be torn out and replaced.

We hope to keep the old windows.  I'm reading up on how to put in improved
weather stripping and storm windows to make the old windows more energy efficient.

Fresh paint.  

New light fixtures.

I can hardly wait!

Not everybody enjoys this kind of project.

Some of you have told me so.

It usually starts with......."why in the world would you tackle this.......?"

Renovating is not most people's choice.

Me?  

I love to take something old and shabby.

And turn it into something warm & friendly & inviting.

I see this house as a gift.

A long awaited gift.

We first stumbled onto the house back in June.

That's when we took our first look at it.

By July, I........ (and eventually Scott).... developed a serious interest in the house.

It was then, we were told the owner's family was taking the house off the market.

For an indefinite period of time.

We had already made an offer.

Already invested in a home inspection.

Already lined up everything to move forward.

Only to find out, it was going no where.

So.  What to do?

Nothing, but wait.

And we did.

So in July.

I was on my way to Anderson.

And I planned on driving by the house as I passed through Due West.

I had the thought.

I'm taking a ribbon with me.

I didn't really have a plan of what to do with it.

I just knew I wanted to take it.

Once in Due West.

I pulled up to the front door.

Walked up the side walk.

And tied the ribbon to the door knob of the front screen door.

For me.

It was symbolic.

My way of attaching my hope & expectation  that things might work out.

And I prayed.

If God wanted me to have this house.

I'd have to trust Him with it.

And trust Him in the wait.

July came and went.

August came and went.

With no certainty of what would happen.

Or what the outcome might be.

And today.

September 10, 2013.

Scott & I closed on the house.

98 years old.

Full of character.

A little worn and shabby.

But holding so much promise!

Watch for news of an estate sale!   We're planning one the morning of Saturday,
October 12th!    The owner left quite a few items in the house, which we'll
be selling to prepare for the renovation to begin.

You're welcome to stop by and see that house that morning as well.
As the official "before" renovation tour is provided.

So.......

Welcome to our journey.

Of renovating "this old house!"

The R.M. Stevenson House.

Will in about six months of renovation.

Become the.

Scott & Kathy Dublin house!

A Shredder & A Legacy

This week at work, I had a special project.

It was audit week.

Accountants were in the office to do field work for our annual audit.

Scrutinizing our financials, bookkeeping & overall operation.

We've always received clean audits and good reports.

I work with dedicated.....and very sharp people.

They do a good job.

And my special project?

I've filled a four drawer file cabinet with what we call "inactive" personnel files.

They're kept in my office.

And because it's full.

It occurred to me.

I've got to purge some of the old files.

I hadn't shredded a personnel file in over 24 years.

Since I became director.

Why?

We frequently have people who leave and come back to work for us.

So, they all stayed locked up and secure.

Until this week.

And I began the process of going through A-Z.

Actually A - V (because there were no Z's.)

And shredding files of staff that have been gone from the agency.

For more than 10 years.

And there were lots and lots of files to shred.

I stacked them in my office on a table.

And each day this week,

I personally went about shredding the files.

A stack at a time.

And in the shredding.

Something happened.

I ran across a wide range of people.

Some came to work and left.

Quickly.

I hardly remembered or recognized their names.

They certainly didn't make an impact here one way or another.

Didn't stay long enough.

Or invest themselves.

They only came and went.

And.

There were others.

Just a few.

That left a pretty negative legacy.

A trail of discontent.

Lack of integrity.

Or work ethic.

Trouble.

Of one kind or another.

I remembered many of their names.

But not.

In a good way.

Still.

There were others.

That stayed a while longer.

And did a pretty fair job.

Some I remembered.

Some I didn't.

I'm not so sure they made a lasting impact.

But they did their job.

No more.

No less.

Maybe a little indifferent.

And finally.

There were others.

Special.

Unforgettable.

Game changing people.

They made more than a difference.

They made us better.

Very rare individuals.

And so dear to me.

I could hardly stand the thought.

Of shredding their file.

And a couple I didn't.

They quietly went back into my cabinet.

And some unknown person.

Will have to dispose of it later.

Maybe, many more years down the road.

But it won't be me.

To be honest.

My shredding made a big impression on me this week.

I realized.

One day.

Someone will be holding my personnel file over a shredding machine.

And all that may remain of my work at the agency.

Will go......the very same way.

I know!

A bit of a dismal thought,

But it really struck me.

No matter the career.

Or the job.

One day.

We'll all finish up.

And what will remain?

How will we be remembered?

What difference will we have made?

There was an important truth for me.

Make a difference where you are.

Be kind.

Work hard.

Care about people.

Don't hold back.

Do the thing!

The shredder comes for all files.

But the legacy?

It remains.

And it does matter.

Remind Me

So.

Something happened yesterday.

And I wanted to pass it along.

I was reminded.

It actually started earlier in the week, now that I think about it.

This simple message of remind me.

We hosted our first home group meeting at our house in Greenwood.

Me & Scott.

For married couples.

In listening to the DVD teaching provided through our church,

the simple message of "remember where you've been"

first caught my attention.

Remember where you've been.

And your faith has a chance to grow.

Because you can see what you overcame.

And the faithfulness of God.

Skip forward.

To yesterday.

We're getting ready for our annual audit at work.

For me,

that meant catching up on some paperwork.

It was a Friday afternoon and very quiet upstairs where my office is located.

I did what I sometimes do.

After the office has cleared out and people go home.

I listened to music.

This time.

It was country music.

The first one I pulled up?

Brad Paisley and Carrie Underwood.

"Remind Me."

You probably know it.

Which led to another favorite.

By Martina McBride.

"I'm goina love you through it."

It's a video tribute to women who have survived cancer.

Very empowering.

And I relate to it completely,

I survived cancer myself.

As did my mom.    And my dad.

After replaying it a second time.

while shuffling papers across my desk,

it began it sink into my spirit.

I've been a bit overwhelmed lately.

I blogged about "impossible tasks" earlier this week.

But my eyes began to open.

And I had a pretty dramatic realization.

Sharing it with Scott at the end of our day,

It went sort of like this:


"You know what?
I have survived cancer!
come on!
I've raised two children.
I've run a million dollar agency for 24 years!
and traveled to Africa four times;
what the heck am I afraid of!?
but more than anything "I" am,
It's about who Jesus is.
And as a follower of Him,
I have the promise of the holy spirit in me.
Which gives me power I don't have on my own.
And I can overcome & succeed in all this stuff
That's been piling onto my plate and into my life!"


And likely,

because of the prayers of my husband and those close to me.

Who knew I was feeling the burden of things piling on.

I got my wings back!   so to speak.

I was reminded.

That through Christ.

I can do all things.

And that He can use country music.

And my past.

To gently.

remind me.

Impossible Tasks

I was reminded today by a friend.

That a few months ago, I made the statement.

"I'm ready for some new challenges in my life."

I said that.

I was in a relatively peaceful.

Downright content season of life.

And I said that.

Man.  

A lot can change in a short period of time.

I've been feeling a little like this turtle.

Climbing out of my tranquil swim in the pond.

And trying to maneuver straight up the side of a rock!

One by one.

Some pretty big challenges have come my way.

You know.

Typical stuff.

BIG projects at work.

Taking steps to buy a hundred year old house in Due West.

Talking to a contractor about a renovation budget.

Imagining actually moving out of a house I've lived in for twenty years.

College tuition due this week.

Leaving for Kenya in four weeks.

You know.

Stuff.

You have your stuff too.

Probably more demanding than mine.

So.

I got up this morning.

Feeling a little overwhelmed.

You ever feel that way?

(smile)

As women, we feel that way......often.

I'm up a little after 5.

Stop by and pour myself a cup of coffee in the kitchen.

My family of cats and dogs usually watch from outside for the first glimpse
of a light inside the house.

But, they can wait.

I need a word.

Bad!

I walk into my living room.

Settle down into my chair.

The house is dark and quiet.

I pick up my bible.

I'm reading in Mark right now.

This morning -- it's Chapter 6.

The feeding of the 5,000.

And from my study notes for this passage in Mark:



"How do you respond
when you're given an impossible task?

A situation that seems impossible with human resources,
is simply an opportunity for God.

The disciples did everything they could by gathering the available food
and organizing the people into groups.

Then, in answer to prayer,

God
did
the
impossible.

When facing a seemingly impossible task,
do what you can & ask God to do the rest.

He may see fit to make the impossible happen."



I can't help it.

I love the fact that God reaches into my day.

Into my specific set of circumstances.

And gives me a word.

That's relevant.

Timely.

And true.

"do what you can and ask God to do the rest"

And my list of impossible tasks.

Just became a bit more manageable.

"simply an opportunity for God."

Great Expectations & Family Vacations

We all have them.

Great expectations.

For family vacations.

We had one of those recently.

Great expectations surrounded our recent family trip out to Oregon.

To see my oldest daughter, Kate & her husband, Josh.

They're spending this year and next as traveling physical therapists.

We hadn't seen them since March.

Here's my photo of them in our driveway just before they began their adventure.

Four long months ago.

There was a lot of anticipation about our trip on both sides.

Just as anxious as we were to see them.

They were looking forward to seeing us.

To show us that part of the country.    

And reconnect after months apart.

We looked forward to our reunion with them.

We anticipated the trip for weeks.

And weeks.

And when anticipation grows.

So do expectations.

It's a good thing.

We can't see too far down the road.

In life.

And in trips.

This face developed before we ever got on the plane in Charlotte.

That would be Taylor.

My youngest.

Artsy.       Witty.        Bright.        Articulate.      Taylor.

I first suspected this face was associated with leaving her boyfriend behind.

Not a shocking surprise.

We persevered.

And got on the plane in Charlotte.

Non-stop to Portland.

And this slightly unhappy face.

Turned into a wretchedly sick face.

Throwing up in one of those airline bags......sick.

Once.

Twice.

Three times.

Multiple times.

And the tone for our family vacation was being set.

And we didn't even know it.

Yep.

The die was being cast.

Have you ever had one of those vacations?

Long awaited.

Anticipated.

Talked about.

Planned for.

Costly vacations.

Yeah.

This would be one of those.

Kate described Oregon's weather.

As always being like a "warm fall day."

Cool temperatures.

No humidity.

Wonderful weather.

All the while.

It was music to our ears.

We were leaving Greenwood.

Hot.

Humid.

Summertime Greenwood.

And our expectations for cooler weather were high.

But.

A funny thing happened.

Our expectations for cooler weather.

Went the way of our sick child.

Oregon had a very unusual weather phenomenon.

The very week we arrived.

Record high temperatures.

As in..........102 degrees.

And we sweltered.

Expecting cooler weather.

We packed jackets.

Long pants.

Long sleeve shirts.

And we got.........are you kidding me?!?

Record setting high temperatures.

Of course we did!?!

But.......hey.

I know what you're thinking.

So what if Taylor spent the first 48 hours in a continual barfing state?

So what if it was incredibly HOT?

So what if you spent the better part of a day.

In the emergency room of a local hospital?

As a very dehydrated and weak Taylor was hooked up to an IV.

Getting needed fluids into her body.

For a non-descript "viral" bug.

And to be fair.

In full disclosure.

I brought along my own contributions to the trip.

Distraction.

Just a couple of days before heading out on the trip.

I did my first walk through of the old house in Due West.

The one that's occupied much of my attention.

Then and now.

And too much time was spent on the trip.

Talking about the pro's & con's of this house.

Distraction.

That was my contribution.

And Kate's expectation of completely focused mom time was a bit dampened.

Yeah.

Not such a good thing I brought along.

But.....

You still got to see Kate & Josh, right??

Yes.

Yes, we did.

We LOVED seeing them.

And.

We explained before coming out.

They were what we really wanted to see.

That was our expectation.

But, my adventuresome, traveling  daughter & son-in-law.

Their expectation was showing us the state.

Of Oregon.

And......in case you didn't know.

Oregon is a very.......BIG.......state.

And over the course of our seven days in Oregon.

We drove over 1,000 miles.

Yes, we did.

From the most unique city of Portland.

To the Pacific coast.

To the mountains.

To the high desert.

It was absolutely beautiful.

All of it.

And at the same time.

It was a lot of time in the car.

Josh's........two door.......Jeep.

The kind of car that requires you to climb in and out.

Up and over seats.

Multiple times a day.

I felt all of my 54 years at the end of that 1,000 miles.

Did I mention the air conditioner didn't work that well?

And nearly all of those 1,000 miles were spent.

Riding with windows rolled down.

Wind tunnel effect.

No point in trying to control your hair.

In the record heat.

I can laugh about it now.

Sick child.

Hospital visit.

Record heat.

Many, many miles of driving.

Without air conditioning.

Great expectations.

Family Vacation.

Ahhh.....

I know.

We got to see our kids.

It was definitely worth all the.......you know.

All the expectations.

In the mist of high expectations and family vacations,

you sometimes get bogged down in the things that don't go as planned.

Some time and distance is often required.

To really look back and appreciate the fact.

That the wonderful moments were there along too.

And lesson learned.

I'm all about learning a lesson.

Go with the flow.

Be flexible!   (to coin a phrase from my Kenya trips with NewSpring)

And keep reasonable expectations.

Above all else.

Really appreciate and hang on to time with your family.

The good.

The not so good.

The unexpected.

And the memorable.

My Balancing Act

I've been learning a profound lesson lately.

And those kind of lessons can be hard.

For me.

I've been learning about how I define balance.

You see,

I really like having balance in my life.

In times of change.

Transition.

Even great challenge.

I always felt that if I balanced key things in my life.

My physical.

With my spiritual.

And emotional.

I could maneuver well through whatever life threw at me.

Your balancing list will look different from mine.

Mine looked like this.


Spend time with Jesus.
Read my bible & pray every day.
Make time for my husband and my family.
Walk 3-4 times a week.
Go to the gym twice a week.
Keep the agency running smoothly at work.
Eat healthy.
Keep my house clean & my laundry processed.
Get plenty of sleep.
Blog or work on my mosaics.
Serve at church.
Be intentional about time with my friends.


If I kept my balance.

If I kept my list balanced.

That was a good thing.

But, if I didn't keep it all balanced,

If I didn't keep everything on my list balanced......

Yeah.

You see where I'm headed.

That's really kind of messed up.

And it was inevitable.

That my way of looking at balance would eventually end up in the ditch.

For me,

it was just usual life stuff.

Challenge and transition at work.

My oldest getting married and moving to the other side of the country.

My nineteen year old moving back home and commuting to school.

Thinking about selling our house.

Missing a few weeks of exercise and the gym.

Doing an illegal u-turn on a busy road and wrecking my car.

And before I knew it,

My balance seemed to be lost.

Sigh.

But.

Truth be told.

And here comes my lesson learning.

"I" am not the source of my balance.

"My" ability to keep all my plates spinning is terribly inadequate.

Things happen.

Things will always happen.

I don't keep my balance by doing a specific list of things.

I keep my balance by allowing Him to lead my life.

All the areas of my life.

The relational.

The physical.

My work.

Any change that's made in where I live.

My health.

My workouts.

The lives of my children.

All of it.

Trying to maintain balance has been exhausting for me.

And I've only recently even realized just how tired I am.

So.

Thankful for a hard lesson.

I am learning.

"The Lord directs the steps of the godly.
He delights in every detail of their lives.
Though they stumble, they will never fall,
for the Lord holds them by the hand."

Psalm 37:23-24.