Thursday, July 31, 2014

Jumping to Conclusions




I've been on the receiving end of a lesson in recent months.

The importance.

Of not jumping to conclusions.

I've done that.

Quite a lot.

When I don't have the whole story.

Or the entire picture.

I color in the unknown.

With speculation.

And guess.

I make assumptions.

And if I'm not careful.

Those assumptions turn into counterfeit truth.



For a stretch of time.

I've been on the receiving end.

When it's been done to me.

My work often offers me that opportunity.

Lucky me!

It happens.

Others evaluate.

Size me up.

Make assumptions.

And sometimes judgments.

About my decisions.

Or what I've done.

Subject to the analysis of others.

It happens.

But.

It doesn't always feel good.

To be on the receiving end.

When people don't have the whole story.

But they go ahead and draw their own conclusions.

Based on the incomplete.

Or the limited perspective.

And it may be.

Maybe many times.

Entirely.

Off base.



Knowing that's been my experience of late.

A similar opportunity found its way to me.

Imagine that.

God allowing me to be the recipient.

And then finding myself as the initiator.



Coincidence?

Mmmm....

Not so much..... most likely.

A situation came across my path.

I didn't have all the facts.

I had only bits and pieces.

And I stepped into it.

Happily.

Easily.

With a creative imagination.

And started drawing my own conclusions.

Loosely based on the "incomplete."

The "partial."

And before I knew it.

An entire scenario was played out in my mind.

And I created my own version of the truth.

What I thought happened.

Doing the same thing.

That had recently been done to me.



Until.

(and this is the part that stings)

He reminded me.

Now.....

Is that really what happened?

Do you really know that for a fact?

Come on.

Are you filling in the gaps and spaces?

And jumping to.....conclusions.

Of how you think.....that went down ?



And I took a breath.

And stepped back.

Reminded of the injustice I felt myself.

When it was being directed at me.

Didn't feel so good then, huh?

I stopped.

And reconsidered.

And gave the person in this situation.

A much deserved break.

That illusive thing not offered.....very often.

The benefit of my doubt.



Oh.

I wanted it offered to me.

And didn't understand why it wasn't!

But, offering it to someone else?

Not so much.

Not so often.



Jumping to conclusions?

Or stopping to reconsider?

Lesson learned?

Or lesson missed?


















Friday, July 25, 2014

Vibrantly Alive & In My Livingroom

This morning.

About 5:15 a.m.

I walked through my dark house.

Headed with a cup of coffee.

Toward my chair in the living room.

My time with Jesus.

Early.

Before anybody else is up.

I reached for the lamp.

And turned it on.

And settled back to get comfortable.

Tucking my feet up under me.

I turned to my devotion.

July 25th.

"Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young.

And I read the first sentence.

"As you listen to birds calling to one another, hear also My love
 call to you..."


And without any notice.

It SHOT UP beside me.

Out of no where.

I about JUMPED out of my chair.

A fluttering, humming movement.

Directly at eye level.

Inches away.


A HUMMINGBIRD!

In my house.

At 5:15 a.m.

Hovering right beside me.

Whattttttt??????


I was hardly awake enough to process what I saw.

It hung there near the lamp.

In mid air.

Humming.

Yeah.....that sound that hummingbirds make.

And quickly.

It descended to land.

No joke.

On the arm of the chair I was sitting in.

Incredible.


Where in the world did you come from?

It had to be my porch door.

I prop it open in the morning.

So my cats can come and go as they please.

And my cats??

No where to be found.

Amazing! but they missed it.


Geez.

Okay.

What do I do with you?

I eased carefully out of the chair.

He stayed put.....amazingly.

And I went to the kitchen.

How in the world will I catch you?

Right!!

Not very likely.

But I returned anyway.

Garbage bag in hand.

I didn't want to hurt him.

I just wanted to help him outside.


And as I walked back into the room.

He had vanished.

No evidence of him.

No reappearance.

Gone.




You'd have to know me.

But......I always try to figure out the meaning of things.

And this little guy's appearance at 5:15 a.m.

Not sure.

But.....wow.

A hummingbird appearing during my quiet time with Jesus.

In my house.

That's a first.

And I'm taking it as evidence of what I went on to read:



"As you listen to birds calling to one another,
hear also
My love call to you.

I speak to you continually:
through 
sights, 
sounds, 
thoughts
impressions, 
scripture.

There is no limit
to the variety of ways
I can communicate with you.

Your part is to be attentive to My messages.
In whatever form they come.

When you set out to find Me in a day,
you discover 
that the world is 

vibrantly alive

with 
My presence."

Sarah Young,  "Jesus Calling"


How cool is that?


Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Busted & A Bit Humbled

I've been.......so busted.

Better watch yourself.

You may find yourself on the receiving end too.

Eating your words.

That's what I've had to do.

My mantra for years?

Embrace change!

Be uncomfortable.

Allow yourself to be uneasy.

Step out.

Don't hide from new opportunities.

Then?

The moving truck pulled up to my back door.


Every piece of furniture was loaded.

And hauled to a new location.

Where it was set in place.

Looking a million times different than it did where it came from.

We moved.

Of course we moved!

Excuse me.

But that's what we've been working toward for almost a year.

Finish renovating the house in Due West.

And move into it.

That's been the plan.

And then?

It became reality.

The movers finished.

And left.

The door was closed.

And night fell that first day.

And I was exhausted.

And I got just a few hours of sleep.

And the next day.

I must have cried.

A dozen times.

Totally ridiculous.

I know.

Hard to imagine, right?

Me.

"Miss" -- jump off the deep end of the pool.

Do what makes you feel uncomfortable!

Travel to the bush of Africa - many times.

And I bawled like a baby on and off in a new house.

Questioning.

What have I done?

Why are we here?

Lord have mercy!

Thankfully.

Scott was my only witness.

And he mostly looked perplexed.

 And at a loss.

A new home.

A new town.

Nothing familiar.

Everything "uncomfortable."

Geeeehhh.

Get a grip -- I told myself.

And thankfully.

That first day passed.

And the second day went better.

Thank you, Jesus!

My house was set up.

Day by day it started to look more like I imagined.



My things were arranged.

Pictures were hung.

And it started it to feel more like home.

Today?

We've been here 10 days.

And I know which light switch turns on which light.

I know the drawer in the kitchen that holds the silverware.

And the one that holds my stash of dark chocolate.

I've learned the sounds of this old house.

And I'm sleeping much better.

All my animals have adjusted really well.

It's starting to feel more comfortable.

Starting to feel like home.

And.

My hard line mantra of telling others to embrace change.

And what you fear.

Has been a little softened.

Busted.

And a bit humbled.




Monday, July 7, 2014

Not Just A House




I'm down to my last few nights in this house.

So focused on the renovation work in Due West.

I've not thought a whole lot.

About what this will feel like.

Leaving this house.


This was the first house Scott & I ever owned.

Nine months pregnant when we moved in.

Almost to the day.

Twenty-one years ago.


It's not just real estate.

It's been home.

Comfort.   Love.   Rest.    Refuge.

Our place.


As I started pulling pictures off the walls this weekend.

And packing up in boxes.

The house started getting that.....right after Christmas look.

You know.

That bare.

Empty feeling a house gets right after the holidays.

Now.

We're packing everything up.   And moving on.

But, it won't be easy to leave this house.



Taylor came home here.

From the hospital after she was born.

We had her tea party birthday in this dining room when she was nine.

She stood on these front steps just a few years later.

In her prom dress for pictures.

And pulled out the driveway for the first time.

Driving solo in her car.

Kate.

She played tug-of-war with Sadie in the backyard.

And roller bladed with the kid next door.

She celebrated her 16th birthday.

With friends grilling burgers in the backyard.

The same backyard where we hosted her wedding reception.

A few short years later.....it seemed.

Tanner.

Jasper.

Maddie & Booper.

Sweet pets that lived out their lives in our family.

Here.

All buried in flower beds and under the crab apple tree.

At this house.



Scott & I have had countless conversations at the end of day.

Out there on the porch.

We've had many morning cups of coffee in this kitchen.

We always loved coming here at the end of tough days.

Or after a week of camping at the beach.

Or after a long journey to Africa and back.

There was always something about pulling into this driveway.

And looking at this house.

And walking through this door.

This place of comfort and love.

Not just a house.

It's been home.

Just a few days left here.

And.

A new chapter.

A new beginning awaiting us.

But not before.

I sit and be quiet.

In this house.

This home.

A few days more.