What I'm Lacking

Have you ever been tested or tried?

Or found yourself in a tough season of circumstances?

I'm there right now.

And no.

I don't need a lecture.

About counting my blessings.

I have plenty of reasons to feel blessed.

Plenty.

But.

At the same time.

Just as I've been in periods of time.

When circumstances are light.

And easier.

And uncomplicated.

The opposite can also true.

Circumstances can pile on.

Difficulties.

Challenges.

Demands.

Yes.

The kind that can kick you in the teeth.

Or be more subtle.

Exhaustingly.... hard seasons.

My mom worries when I write posts about hardship.

"Are you okay?" she'll ask me tomorrow.

"I worry about you."

Yeah.

I'm okay.

And I am.

Life can just be hard sometimes.

My faith tells me to thank God during trials and hardships.

I have a hard time doing that.

Just being honest.

So.......as I'm working on thankfulness during trials.

I do know that hard seasons show me things about myself.

Right now?

I'm learning about......today.

Of living in today.

And I'm doing that.

Because too far beyond that can be a bit overwhelming.

Today.

Is where I find relationship.

With Him.

Not in the past.

Not somewhere in the future.

But today.

That's what He's showing me.

He provides the strength that I need.

Today.

He supplies the courage that I need.

Today.

He equips me for.

Today.

So, I try to hold nothing back.

I get up and spend time with Him.

And tell Him how I feel.

If it's discouraged.

I tell Him.

If it's fear.

I tell Him.

If it's wishing for an easier time of it.

I tell Him that too.

Today.

Tough seasons of time are part of living.

And me?

Maybe it's a time for me to see what I'm made of.

Or more truthfully.

It's a time for me to see what I'm lacking.

I'm lacking.

He's providing.

And I'm finding Him.

In today.